Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Why erotic humiliation?

In a world where males are taught to prove how fabulous they can be, why would anyone knowingly seek to be humiliated, especially within a sexual or erotic context? I mean, a guy who gets off on being insulted, degraded or overpowered by a strong, smart, sexy female must have serious mental issues, right? At the very least he must suffer from a dreadful lack of self-esteem...

Wrong.

These assumptions couldn't be further from the truth. I have met a multitude of men who are intelligent, successful, competent and confident in every facet of their lives and yet come to me craving humiliation in its various forms. For some, it's the string of verbal insults, name calling and attacks on their masculinity which appeals to them. For others, being spanked, flogged, or reprimanded in some other corporally fashioned manner is the main craving. And for a very brave lot, being forced into compromising and embarassing (and often public) situations can be just the element that arouses a burning sexual need that is most profound and all-consuming.

Many people become baffled at the thought of a man who willingly subjects himself to sensual and/or erotic humiliation, especially at the hand of a woman. How can he even call himself a man if he allows a female to treat him in such a way, one might wonder. The answer to this question is really quite simple, though perhaps the concept may not be so easy to wrap one' s mind around, given the societal constrictions in which we live.

Men need to be humbled. Unfortunately for most, they are taught the exact opposite. For when a male is objectified, defiled, eroticized, emasculated or humiliated, it is in these moments he finally becomes able to commune with his higher self. Consider the Christ story. Here was a man who was demeaned, tortured and ultimately crucified for the "greater good". Those schooled in the Christian faith are more than familar with the link between Christ's suffering and humiliation and the opportunity for redemption for all of mankind. I posit that the man who seeks humilating experiences is in essence, longing to embrace a piece of that redemption and make an attempt at resignation to all that binds him to the very confining societal mores of what it means to be a male. A sense of balance is restored. Through humiliation, one can experience moments of profound inner peace.


The Malignatrix

1 comment:

Rotkopf said...

What you have said is so very accurate. The part about finding inner peace particularly moved me - I have been told that in the past too and it helps dominants to understand a little more of what is happening in the submissive mind. That level of emotion is so intense - it's almost spiritual!

However, what are your thoughts about when a submissive fights in his head about his desire for humilation - he craves it like a drug and wants more and more, and yet feels such shame and guilt afterwards he feels unable to cope, so much so that he tries to forget this part of his life entirely. Can someone ever forget - especially if they are so sexually aroused by extreme humiliation...